My new website is up and running. This blog has been folded into it.

Please visit me at:

My new website is almost ready to launch. Here’s a picture Jimmy took for the homepage:

I have grown so much over the last year. I’ve learned that it’s never too late to discover new teachers and lessons. I’ve grown new brain cells. On a walk today I noticed new green growth all around me:


I borrowed a friend’s camera to record the rippling lake in front of his house, and was surprised when I saw the video I uploaded. It looks surreal. But maybe it does capture the altered state I entered whenever I sat down to meditate up in Damariscotta, Maine.

Now that these cherry blossoms have vanished, the videos I took while lying beneath them remain as a reminder of Roshi Pat Enkyo O’Hara’s words to me:

“The Japanese see cherry blossoms as a symbol of our lives,” Roshi explained. “They come at the very early part of the spring, when it’s cold. Their beauty makes you want to cry.”

I thought of how I’d meditated in my front yard, under thousands of cherry blossoms.

“One of the reasons why we cry is that these blossoms are so ephemeral,” Roshi continued. “They will fall,” she said simply. “And to watch the cherry blossoms fall is like watching ourselves die. We start off young and beautiful. Then we become middle aged and beautiful in a different way. Eventually we’re old and beautiful, and finally we’re dead and beautiful.”

(If you watch carefully, you can catch a couple of petals falling early on in the video)

I am editing my manuscript…and this is what it looks like at the moment…

My sweet little camera broke also…so I won’t be blogging as regularly…for a while…

Thank you to Jimmy for recording my progress this year with all these shots of me meditating!

So much happened in the month of December that I had to revise my manuscript over and over again. The painful loss of someone dear to me challenged all the progress I made over the last year.

Still, I am left with hope. And these words from Thomas Wolfe’s You Can’t Go Home Again:

Pain and death will always be the same.

But under the pavements trembling like a pulse, under the buildings trembling like a cry…

there will be something growing like a flower, something bursting from the earth again, forever deathless, faithful,

coming into life again like April.

– Thomas Wolfe

As I finish up the manuscript for my book, I’m going to take a break from blogging. It seemed fitting to post this short Tara Brach video meditation, which is a great way to take a sacred pause:

I went down to Philadelphia to talk to Dr. Andrew Newberg, who I’ve been working with this past year. Inspired by the studies done on the brains of Tibetan monks, I was determined to get my brain to light up on an MRI scan, proving to me in living color that meditation produces physical changes. Andy did a baseline scan of my brain, I practiced lovingkindness meditation for 8 weeks, and then he scanned me again and noted the changes.

Did I become a mellow monk this year? Here is his verdict:

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